When You Won’t Fuck the Boss, OR A Woman Scorned

I’m one of the rare Black men that likes Black women almost exclusively. Worse than that, I happen to have a thing for dark-skinned girls and natural Black hair. Of the 80 some-odd bitches that I’ve fucked, only one was ‘Spanish’, or quite realistically, ‘Latino’ and two were white. The others were some variation of Black, including African, Haitian, Jamaican and all the other islands everywhere.

I got fired from my bullshit Real Estate job yesterday. It happened a little quicker than I thought it would, but I knew that it would, that it had to eventually. As far as productivity was concerned, I wasn’t spectacular. My old company required that agents close a deal a month and in the 7 months I had worked there, I’d closed only 11 deals. This, of course, was better than the quota, but it wasn’t enough to consider me sensational. The only argument that could have gone in my favor was that I did have a talent for getting people to give me their money.

Aside from closing deals, getting a deposit on an apartment is a huge thing in the Real Estate game. A deposit is just a fancy word for having somebody give you a lump sum; usually anywhere from $500 to a month’s rent, to “take an apartment off the market”. Taking an apartment off the market is just more fancy talk for saying to clients that because you put your money down, nobody else will show the apartment from our company while your application is being reviewed. I had 31 deposits.  The fact that 20 of my deals died just showed that I took money from some people that clearly weren’t qualified to rent apartments, but there were also maybe 5 or 6 deals that died because of the ineptitude of the people at my former company.

Now, my office manager had been this Puerto Rican chick. The first time she’d ever seen me, her eyes had flashed. I didn’t take it to mean anything. I was, as Richard Pryor would say, “cleaner than a broke-dick dog”, wearing a suit, shaved up, it was my interview for Christ’s sake. My first reaction to her was, “I’d hit.” There was no enthusiasm in this. It was just a category. It was a much smaller category than all the women that I wouldn’t hit, but it was a way bigger category than the elite little group that I actually wanted to hit.

She was about a 6; mid-30s, ok looking in the face, bad skin, no tits, big ass, but she had that kind of belly that women who had just given birth within the last 8-10 months usually have. I kept waiting to see the baby. As it turned out, the youngest of her three kids was 8 years old.

And she was married and I was still with my girlfriend so for a while, there were no problems. But then me and my girl broke up.

And let me just say here that maybe part of this is my fault. See, I’ve always harbored something close to a resentment for ‘Spanish’ chicks which, quite frankly, isn’t at all on them. My problem has been that Spanish chicks always seemed to expect me to want them. Like, as a Black dude, my lust towards them should be a given. Of course, the people really responsible for this dilemma are other Black dudes. If the majority of you niggas weren’t eternally going on about ‘Spanish Mamis’ the rest of us wouldn’t have to deal with situations like the one I found myself in.

Once it became clear, and I don’t know how it did, that I was single again, I should have started some obligatory fawning over my office manager. This chick was totally insecure. She’d already had one Black chick fired ostensibly for being hotter than she, my office manager, was. Another pretty Black chick got greeted with nothing but scorn and ridicule and eventually had to switch offices. And another ‘Spanish’ chick, a long tall drink of water with an actual pretty face, got treated with outright rage and contempt.

When I fully realized the situation I sent a text message to my office manager in which I tried to flirt. That placated her for a little while. But yesterday was the end of the line.

In To Kill a Mockingbird, a Black man was actually murdered because he wouldn’t fuck a white woman. Hell, in the bible, Joseph was thrown into prison for nearly 13 years because he wouldn’t fuck Potiphar’s wife.

And while it’s not even that I wouldn’t have fucked my office manager, it’s just that since I don’t possess the Brandoesque skills that would have enabled me to come across as if I actually wanted the pussy, when I think about things in a historical context, shit, I got off easy!

About the Author


Dickie Bhee is a self-styled lunatic, a Renaissance showman, a Class A, Grade A buffoon, a nigga that believes in the greatness of Niggerhood a social gadfly and a genuine Man About Town.
Also: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E7NYMP4

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