First of all, she’s a Latina.
Nate Parker, star of the upcoming Nat Turner biopic, Birth of a Nation, has a wife that got the poor fool dragged (and defended) on social media because of her pale skin is being mislabeled as a “white” woman.
Trust me, there’s a huge difference between a Latina and a white woman. Just ask one. Ask either, actually.
I mean, her last name was DiSanto, not Spears, Perry, Swift or Cyrus.
Then there’s the division in responses to her – since she’s interpreted as being white – which, though predictable, are still pretty damn interesting.
As it turns out, the sisters are more or less giving her and Nate a pass.
It’s Black men who have more or less quarantined themselves as haters and come out as adamantly opposed.
Now, this response flies in the face of, as I’ve written before, the way I was raised.
Growing up surrounded by nothing but Black women, a nigga wasn’t even granted full authenticity until the ladies of my family saw a wife.
Therefore, some new Black rising star would be treated with suspicion until a pic surfaced somewhere of him with his arm wrapped around a female.
If that female was Black, he was ok to be celebrated.
If not, don’t speak his name aloud.
This being the case, Tweets like the following, represent to me the dawning of a new sensibility in Black female America:
Ppl are really pressed that Nate Parker's wife is white as if this invalidates all of his work and activism. Y'all are annoying.
— Ruthless (@RuthOhanu) August 5, 2016
Nate Parker is married to a white woman but he's conscious as hell and doesn't forget where he comes from, let him love.
— SieAllen†☾ (@SierraSheIs) August 5, 2016
Folks who preach about peace and colorism being a disease are the same frauds mad Nate Parker is married to a white woman and I'm sick of it
— Anastasia B.Verhausn (@GideonSlaygo) August 5, 2016
So because Nate Parker's wife is white all the things he has done for the black community is void???? Ya'll are some real dumbasses
— Picasso Hemingway (@ChelsDreams) August 5, 2016
I'm seeing the reactions to Nate Parker's white wife and I just wanna log off for the day
— fadumo (@faaaadumo) August 5, 2016
I’d like to say I’m totally relieved by this and the truth is, I’m mostly relieved but, you know me, I’m also kinda troubled.
See, I’m the first to agree with the philosophy that you can marry whoever the fuck you want, and despite some of my clowning posts of the past, I never really try to play psychologist to detect the levels of perceived self-loathing allegedly evidenced by those that chronically date outside their race, but there is one issue that Black women have too readily accepted that is more than problematic, it’s downright self-genocidal.
The worst part is, the women that embrace the following ethos are some of the ones you’ll hear calling most ardent and stringently for “Black Unity.”
And that ethos is “I don’t need no man”.
I’m almost tempted to imagine that my people can’t be that stupid and that this was a mindset installed with Willie Lynch Syndrome and all the other methods of systematic control and destruction of Black culture.
How on earth could a woman not need a man?
Hell, men need men.
And the fact that you’re alive unless you’re ready to argue that there needs to be an addition to the New Testament, is evidence that a man was “needed” for your very existence.
And the worst part, the scariest too, is the fact that far too many women that either believe or utter this nonsense are parents; predictably single parents.
Simply, the reason the very creation of a child requires two parents is because the child will need both of them, and anybody actively perpetuating the notion that Black women don’t “need” men is doing a far worse thing than selling crack in a school zone.
They’re not only attempting to get us to view as “normal” the scarcity of Black men due to imprisonment, murder and “distraction” (fill in your own blank there), but they’ve also – like I’ve written 2 billion times – thrust masculine traits like “strength” upon Black women, cleverly making them ineligible for beauty.
That shit is ridiculous.
We’re dysfunctional enough already.
And to get better, we’ll need each other.