White America Made Me Proud; Black America Made Me Prouder

“Oh, they are wildin,” I heard a voice say.

Turns out, it was my own.

I was watching this shit from the treadmill at the Bed Stuy Planet Fitness, work having prevented me from catching the actual swearing in of America’s 45 President, what’s-his-face.

But the protesters were totally outta control.

Breaking glass, setting fires, tossing live shit at the police; they made Hurricane Katrina victims look like orderly shoppers.

And I’m sure that muhfuccas is lying about the numbers – or maybe not.

I mean, I wanna say that there’s no way that only about 100 people got arrested when all that shit was going down, but there was also another noteworthy thing going down.

Now, I don’t wanna take all the credit for this happening, but it does seem that niggas are either reading Dickiebheeonthestreets.com or we simply knew intuitively, maybe even atavistically to sit this one out.

This isn’t our fight.

This shit was between white people, we’d be better served (and more entertained) if we simply stayed on the sidelines during this shit and watched.

And don’t get me wrong, the shit was policed entirely differently than it would have been had we had a strong presence in it.

Like I said, there may indeed have only been 100 arrests.

Those arrests were relatively gentle too.

And even though almost everybody in town knew to expect ridiculously violent protesters, I didn’t see a single Goddamn business owner standing outside of his shop with a shotgun.

Can you imagine if little Manny whoever-the-fuck from Eastern or Southern Europe had shot some lilly white protester for breaking his store glass?

They’d give that muhfucca The Chair.

No, but the comedy was some of the other shit the cops were doing.

When it’s white protesters, it’s misguided countrymen, you gotta remember that.

So instead of aggressively cracking heads or even making wholesale mass arrests, the cops were running besides these fools spraying them with… something.

Don’t know if it was mace, don’t know what it was.

And it’s funny but, unlike Black Lives Matters, I betcha won’t hear the Democrats or the Libs referred to as a “terrorist group” despite the fact they’re down in our nation’s capital literally tearing shit up.

But really, I don’t wanna seem like I’m condemning them, I’m actually proud of my white brethren for, as the saying goes, “takin’ it to the streets.

You’re only now getting a visceral connection to experiencing unbelievable and outrageous bullshit – like having Russia pick America’s President – and then having to watch as your vocal criticisms get mocked or go unheard entirely.

Makes you wanna holler, right?

And it’s good to see that ya’ll can use some of that violent energy for something productive other than soccer hooliganism and local team and college championships.

But please, whatever y’all do, do try to seduce us niggas into joining y’all lunacy with some bullshit line about how “this affects you too.”

No it doesn’t.

Rent’s gotta get paid, white people.

That may also be another reason not too many of us joined y’all.

Couldn’t afford a trip to DC just to tear shit up and get arrested.

Not too many Black pops can give us “small loans” of a million dollars, and none, if they’re alive, not in jail and we’re on speaking terms, wouldn’t bail us out for doing something as silly as protesting an American election.

So we’re just, like I said, watching.

And if Trump can keep his promise at least as far as more and better jobs are concerned, some of us may even start to fuck with dude.

About the Author

Dickie Bhee is a self-styled lunatic, a Renaissance showman, a Class A, Grade A buffoon, a nigga that believes in the greatness of Niggerhood a social gadfly and a genuine Man About Town. Also: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E7NYMP4

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