As far as dating is concerned, my track record is 100% Black women.
If we’re talking just fucking, that percentage drops precipitously.
Don’t get me wrong, tho: I’m no prize. I’m a misogynistic, chauvinistic, violent ego maniac.
I’ll bite a bitch, slap her, cook breakfast for her, then kick her in the sternum.
Still, to me Black women simply look better than other hoes, and also being that I, Dickie Bhee, am the best writer alive, the best writer ever born, the greatest man walking and the product of a Black woman, kinda gives Black women an edge, wouldn’t you think?
So when I pass interracial couples of either race and gender mixing, Black man/white woman, Black woman/white man, I usually regard them critically, but with no hostility whatsoever.
If it’s a Black dude with a white chick and she’s bad – phat ass and all – hey, how can anybody knock that?
If it’s a Black chick and the white boy is fly clothes and all, whatever.
Yet, this being the world we live in, the above listed examples are almost never the case and instead I’m usually left frowning at a series of peculiar choices.
And don’t get me wrong, absolutely everything indeed being within the realm of possibility, I have, in fact, considered the necessary steps I’d take should I ever find myself in love with some pale denizen.
First, I’d recuse myself from all Black discussion.
No longer able to speak for Black people now only for my own Black ass, I’d choose not to talk at all.
Second, the race of my new love would be the last thing I’d ever discuss.
It would, in fact, only be some shit you found about if and when you actually met her.
So a phenomenon I’ve noticed when it comes to many Black people in interracial relationships that positively blows my mind isn’t only the fact that so many of them rush to mention the race of their beloved first, but they also, oddly, bizarrely and inexplicably seem to positively loathe meeting or dealing with fellow Blacks of the opposite gender that are also in interracial relationships.
That shit makes no sense to me.
You’d think there’d be some kinda club.
I suspect – and this is junk science so don’t attribute too much to it – that many people that find themselves in serial interracial relationships, actually hate, are jealous of, or feel inferior to their same gender in the race their attracted to.
Like if a Black dude only likes white women, he could hate, be jealous of, or feel inferior to white men.
He doesn’t have, in other words, my prodigious self-esteem.
Also, if some nigga that only likes white girls finds out some Black bitch is into white boys, he’ll go ballistic!
He’ll start calling her a “bed-wench” and trying to make it seem like the relationship could only be sexual, treating her like some kind of traitor to a cause that he doesn’t even support.
Similarly, yesterday, when it came to light that the young white woman at the center of the 62 year-old Emmett Till murder, Carolyn Bryant Donham, lied about the fact that the 14 year-old Till had even whistled at her, there were a bunch of reactionary Tweets, but this one stood out.
These are the grandmothers of the WW you love so much BM. Emmett Till.
— BlkPhilosophersStone (@HarmonyEliana) January 27, 2017
That seemed crass to the point of absurd so I tweeted her back, telling her to stop, surprising myself to discover that she’s actually oomf.
A short, hostile, Twitter beef ensued – her providing the hostility – then she Tweeted that her “mate” isn’t even Black.