We Already Know the Russians Rigged the Election So Stop Wasting Our Tax Dollars on this Bullshit

JFK must be rolling over in his grave.

Not only did he hate the Ruskies, Khrushchev especially, but perhaps his most dire fear was that they’d edge ahead of us in technology, become the worldwide image of the more “advanced” society.

And that shit was problematic because how could you sell the notion that capitalism was so much better than communism when the commies had already put Sputnik in orbit?

Never mind that most of the countries that President Kennedy was tryna keep from turning commie were Black, yellow and brown counties, countries that could have just as well said – and did say – Well, what about the domestic treatment of your American Negroes? to which Mr. President had to respond, “We’re uh… we’re working on that.”

But forget all that now, after 60 some odd years of winning the battle, the Russians have won the war.

Not only did they electronically pick our Pres, but we’re so embarrassed by how clearly behind technologically we are that we’ve gone and brought in our own secret weapon: lawyers.

Now we’re gonna have the courts tied up wasting good tax payer dollars for probably as many as 4 years to tell us something that everybody old enough to read already knows.

And make no mistake, there’s nothing more American than a lawsuit.

I’ll never forget my response to simply hearing that a suit was pending on the now legendary case of the woman that sued McDonald’s because the coffee was too hot.

I kept thinking, isn’t the notion that coffee would otherwise be hot implied???

And whatever with how bad her leg was burned by the spilled coffee, she also spilled the coffee on herself.

It wasn’t like some klutz at the window fucked up and poured the shit on her.

But she won nearly 3 millie on that jawn so… God bless her.

And seriously, by now, you’d think the American people would be tired of being fleeced.

When JFK got murked, we paid for the Warren commission, we also, of course and disgustingly, footed the cost for the bailout – perhaps an all-time low – and now we’ve gotta pay for this bullshit.

And perhaps the grossest shit is the fact that it’s always the poorest people that are seemingly left hefting the largest segment of the debt.

Our beloved President don’t pay no Goddamn taxes.

It’s you and me that are being stuck like that nigga that Caine caught slippin at the drive-thru:

And it’s knowing that shit like this alleged “investigation into Russian tampering” goes down that makes people suspicious of everything.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard people say that there’s been a remedy for AIDS and that rich people pay once and are cured and that poor people pay continuously and only to stave it off, never actually being cured.

And how can you argue when you know that Magic Johnson was supposed to be dead since 1997?

Now we’ve gotta stand around and watch the government dig deep into our pockets to “get to the bottom of” some shit we knew was going down since the debates.

It took Nixon – two Presidents later – to put a man on the moon, which had been Kennedy’s goal all along.

Maybe after Hillary’s finally elected in 2024 after 5 years of President Pence who will have ascended to the Presidency on November 22, 2019 after an incident involving President Trump driving through Indiana in a convertible, we’ll shake off our Russian bosses and become the World’s Leader again.

But that still won’t get us none of our Goddamn money back.

About the Author

Dickie Bhee is a self-styled lunatic, a Renaissance showman, a Class A, Grade A buffoon, a nigga that believes in the greatness of Niggerhood a social gadfly and a genuine Man About Town. Also: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E7NYMP4

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