They say you should never ask somebody to do something you wouldn’t do yourself.
And don’t get me wrong, it’s not just cause I’m not gay.
Quite frankly, I wouldn’t make a good fag at all and would be so self-loathing that, thinking I’m corrupting whoever I’m fucking, my preference would be non-Black dudes just to avoid soiling my fellow Negroes.
I’m funny like that (pardon the pun).
However, the specimens I’m gonna hafta ask you to deal with, my fine, buxom, Phat Ass White Girls, are not the superstar white boy sex symbol stars of stage and screen.
They’re the white boys that, due to the internet, haven’t come outside in so long that their first splash of sunlight would give them a strain of skin cancer so lethal that it would kill them instantly.
These boys are beyond geeks.
They iEverything, including masturbation.
While at their desktops, they’ve got all the stuff they need within arm’s reach and if you made the mistake of touching a sock that they weren’t wearing, you’d not only likely find it hard as a rock (if it wasn’t sopping wet), but you’d also find yourself wondering why it seemed to be fitted to ankles much smaller than the owner clearly possessed.
These guys are pathetic.
They have no non-video sexual comprehension whatsoever.
And they need you.
We need you.
Black America and the world.
You see, these vermin have begun to emerge from behind their computer screens.
They’ve become mobilized.
We thought we’d seen the worst – and hoped the only – when we saw Dylann Roof, but now reading the bullshit that jackass Baltimore-born New York-bound racist killer James Jackson was talking in The New Daily News, it made me realize that, fuck sleeper cells, there’s a buncha muhfuccas that’s wide awake and think just like this dude!
And they won’t be on none of Trump’s terrorist watch lists neither.
Now, the obvious question would be that since it’s you Phat Ass White Girls that are the race traitors, why are these guys so interested in killing the niggas y’all are fucking and not ya’ll?
But quite honestly, I’d just like to see an end to the killing.
Sorta like if I could go back in time, I wouldn’t try to kill Hitler, I’d just buy one of that lunatic’s paintings.
Give him a few words of encouragement.
Betcha that would save a lotta lives.
Similarly, as preventive maintenance against this strain of recent anti-Black male murders, that, if we’re honest, actually started with George Zimmerman, I’m asking that y’all seek these geeks out.
I know they’re not sexy.
I know there are studded dildos with more personality.
I know you’d rather all fuck me – and who can blame you for that? – but the bottom line is, my people are in danger.
And since like with the missing girls in DC, I can guarantee you that the government will just stand aside and look, Black Lives Matter will be useless because the perps ain’t the cops, and on the surface, it’ll seem like only individuals and not some affected collective at work thereby keeping Black people from focusing our attention and our outrage, I basically have no choice but to appeal to y’all directly.
They say “once you go Black you never go back”, but if y’all don’t take it upon yourselves to keep the deranged males from your tribe from killing us, pretty soon you’ll have no choice.