Michelle Goes Natural, Sage Gets Canned, Suge Lies On Tupac & Beyonce Dies WITH Our Sins

Some days are just blacker than others.

And what I’m going to attempt to do now is give a recap of perhaps the blackest day since Howard University had it’s first ever Homecoming Queen with an Afro, and also, perhaps, if there’s time, add some perspective, you know, if I have any.

Clearly an avid reader of Dickiebheeonthestreetz, particularly the post where I finally I dropped off the fence and literally demanded that all Black women start rocking natural hair effective immediately, former First Lady Michelle Obama has shown evidence of her compliance.

Well done.

That makes 1 more down, 13,440,000 to go.

They try to credit Emiliano Zapata with the phrase “I’d rather die on my feet than live on my knees”, but y’all know as well as I do that James Brown first said that shit in “Say it Loud”.

Well, today Sage Steele proved that just cause you’re already on your knees, don’t mean that you’ll be spared.

Ms. Steele got fired today from her job as co-anchor on ESPN’s NBA Countdown and, although I don’t see this as a cause for celebration, Ms. Steele’s often nasty, condescending and downright hostile attitude towards her fellow Negro was, if a ploy to curry favor with her white superiors, failed, and if natural, then certainly deserving of a place in her own private hell – which I’m sure she’ll adjourn to.

Dude, it became dead obvious when you threw your ex-wife in there.

I mean, you might have gotten away with saying you saw some gang-related goons, but your ex-wife?

Bet there’s no animosity there that wouldn’t benefit from having her attached to some crime, huh?

21 years later, Suge Knight’s back with the, er, “truth” about what happened that night as he sat beside Tupac in a BMW that got riddled with the bullets that eventually caused Pac’s death.

And we should believe him too.

Look how forthcoming he’s been.

And so, as it turns out, he was actually the intended target and the shooters, in the interest of expediency, shot through the passenger’s side window and through Pac to get to him.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeYeah.

Shoulda just blamed the whole shit on Lee Harvey Oswald.

Doing that, believable or not, at least works.

Finally, in my youth, I was a romantic, in my teens, I just liked pussy and now I’m just lonely.

So imagine my despair as I forced myself to sit moping through Beyonce’s expertly edited “Die With You” video, a song in which I believe she’s actually accompanying herself on the piano.

Huge fan of Beyonce that I am, I was no big fan of Lemonade, thinking the bulk of the songs on the album sucked ass so bad they almost outweighed the stellar work that was “Hold Up”, “Formation”, “Freedom” and “Daddy Lessons”.

This new joint, which is kinda a dual tribute to her love for Hov and her love for Blue Ivy is probably a tear-jerker by design and I feel like I got jerked.

Think she was going for a wedding song?

You know, something to replace “Love U 4 Life” and “I Couldn’t Love You More“?

Not if I’m getting married.

If a bitch is ever bad enough to pull off the stunt that results in me in the aisle, it’ll be a little ditty from Hot Chocolate which, for obvious lyrical reasons, will be on repeat all night.

About the Author

dickiebhee
Dickie Bhee is a self-styled lunatic, a Renaissance showman, a Class A, Grade A buffoon, a nigga that believes in the greatness of Niggerhood a social gadfly and a genuine Man About Town. Also: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E7NYMP4

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