Louis CK’s “Thing” is WAAAAAY Off

I know he didn’t think he was turning them hoes on by beating off in front of them.

I mean, it’s not like

  1. He’s sexy in his own right
  2. Chicks get off to watching guys harass themselves

Men, yeah, we like to watch chicks play with themselves.

Watch this:


Ok, who’d I lose?

Is anybody still with me?

Even some of my chick readers we’re probably like, “‘Cuse me for a sec”, then came back smoking a cigarette.

And that’s not even anything hardcore!

Meanwhile, you know who likes to watch dudes masturbate?

That’s right, other dudes.

Louis CK’s gross lack of sexual competence is what should really be on trial here as we condemn him because he’s been accused of sexually harassing multiple women by “forcing” them to watch him masturbate.

I mean, there’s deviancy, don’t get me wrong.

Flashers are deviant.

They get off by showing their junk to the unsuspecting, sometimes children.

I remember being a young boy once in a lockerroom and this way older kid pulled back his towel to reveal a raging hard-on.

Pardon the pun, but I always wondered afterward what the fuck was his point.

Some people just want other people to “see it”, I guess.

And that’s fucking strange.

Whether or not it’s criminal is kinda an issue for the courts, but it is immoral as hell because you’re forcing an image on someone either against their will or without their consent.

And while the slippery slope is that they could, of course, choose not to look, the idea of flashing and beating off in front of people is that you’ve already obscured their line of vision pretty much giving them no choice.

So yeah, it’s wrong.

And what sucks is that I do like Louis CK.

I respect him as one of the more honest comedians, appreciate the courage it takes to be one of the few white comics since Lenny Bruce to use the word ‘nigger’ for comedic effect, and thought he was off the a flying start as far as the decade was concerned after appearing in two great movies, Blue Jasmine and American Hustle, pretty much back-to-back.

But no, it doesn’t surprise me at all that he’s into the kinda shit that he’s being accused of.

He doesn’t strike me as the type of dude that, before he commodified his sense of humor, had the kind of game or straight up charm to approach a woman on his own merits.

And this isn’t to suggest that the suave, smooth type – like me, of course – are above weirdness, crudity and outright sex crimes, just that there is a type more likely to get into the more foreign shit because their insecurities forced them to imagine that the more traditional routes of approaching the opposite sex were closed to them.

Still, full disclosure: there was a time when even the great Dickie Bhee beat off in front of a woman.

This was years ago.

She wanted to actually “see” me cum.

So she starting kissing my feet as I pulled my meat.

Did the trick.

I’m not proud, but I damn sure ain’t ashamed.

About the Author

Dickie Bhee is a self-styled lunatic, a Renaissance showman, a Class A, Grade A buffoon, a nigga that believes in the greatness of Niggerhood a social gadfly and a genuine Man About Town. Also: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E7NYMP4

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